[from Melissa]

There once was a sexy, blonde Slytherin.
Being invisible was his greatest ambition.
He drank a love potion by mistake.
Now Harry makes his heart ache.
Leaving IP readers screaming, "Just snog him!"

Harry and Ron always stood by each other's side.
Best friends to the end. Secrets they would never hide.
But what Ron didn't know
Was that Harry wanted a go
On Draco's I'm-Too-Sexy Love Ride.

After Harry turned the lights off
He dreamed he shagged Draco's pants off
So imagine his surprise
When he woke to bright blue eyes
And a grumpy Ron screaming, "Harry GEROFF!"

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[from Usa-p]

What a scene Ron did see in the fog!
His eyes bugged out and he was agog!
For there in the snow
were two he did know
sharing quite the delectable snog.

Draco mouthed wide with a stutter
Cuz Harry had whipped cream and butter
But then all was good,
and you fangirls should
get your minds out of the gutter. ^_~

(a singing telegram to dear Draco)
The cause of your great angst sends word
in case you had't already heard
To quote him, he said
once he gets you in bed
there's gonna be lots of <censored>

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[from Piper]

Oh Rhysenn, you cause us great pain!
Though we beg you again and again,
You deny us the bliss
Of one simple kiss!
It drives your readers insane!

In a quest to vanish from sight
Draco ended up in quite a plight
He fell for his foe
which caused him great woe
but filled Rhysenn's fans with delight!

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[from Agehanokoi]

There once was a hottie named Potter
Who yearned for a boy even hotter.
"The fanficcers are right.
It was love at first sight.
If we haven't snogged yet, then we oughta."

There once was a Slytherin boy
By the name of Draco Malfoy.
He chugged down a drink
That soon made him think
Snogging Potter could be quite a joy!

Hermione was really quite shocked
To hear just how Harry got "boxed."
"Just be glad," Harry said,
With his face burning red,
"Not to hear how we got it unlocked."

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[from Dixie Malfoy]

Now Harry was a handsome young bloke
who could always enjoy a good joke
However, Draco's notion
of inventing that potion
was enough to give Harry a stroke

Draco had thought he was smart,
didn't think it would mess with his heart.
He choked, "This can't be!"
For he first saw Harry!
The shock alone from it made him dart.

Harry was tired of kissing.
He wanted to see Draco missing.
But those steely gray eyes
made Harry's blood rise,
was enough to send his heart whizzing.

Hermione was in on the plan
and when Ron found out, he ran!
He said, "This can't be!
Draco's a he!
How can you be in love with a man?"

Dear Rhysenn, you should take a bow.
We're all in love with your story and how!
But we're setting the clock.
Get rid of your Block!
So they can just snog already now!

We're all awaiting with joy
this story about boy meets boy.
Will the potion wear off?
Or will Draco just scoff,
"There was never a potion. T'was a ploy!"

"I was in love with Harry, you see,
but I knew it wouldn't work--him and me,
unless I had lied
about a potion that tied
and bound him together to me."

Harry was outraged, as should be.
He yelled, "How could you lie to me!
You think you're so clever.
I'm leaving forever!"
And he stormed off, making good his decree.

Draco chased after him in the fog.
His voice was hoarse and he croaked like a frog,
"But I love you, can't you see?
It's forever you and me!"
And so Harry gave in and they snogged.

Now Rhysenn, if you are still reading,
it's this warning that you should be heeding:
Give us IP10 now
or you'll wonder, "How
in the world did I get such a beating?"

Draco's in love with Harry.
He wants him so bad it's scary.
But Harry's confused,
Hermione's amused,
and Ron's just a little too wary.

Rhysenn is no longer blocked.
What joy that has brought to her flock.
IP10's coming soon,
perhaps tomorrow at noon?
If that happens, I think I'll be shocked.

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[from Sarah]

It was the day of the big Quidditch match, promising to be a bash,
but dear Harry and sexy Draco made quite a literal smash,
and out of the air our sexy hero fell,
but on what happens next we shall not dwell,
Oh, how I do love this slash!

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[from Spidey]

There was once a cute Slytherin named Draco,
Who, to tell you the truth, was quite whacko.
He mixed up a potion,
When he had a cunning notion,
But it ended worse than the surgery on Jacko.

The poor kid found that his spell,
Hadn't really fared very well.
When he looked at Potter,
(That sexy little seeker)
He couldn't help but fancy him like hell.

Now Malfoy asked Harry for assistance,
But found that he couldn't keep his distance,
Consequently he snogged him,
(That seductive little Slytherin)
But damn Potter keeps putting up resistance!

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[from s'Lairn]

Up within the astronomy tower
Our sexy heroes wait and lie
Stuck in a trunk, so close together
Draco's wand against his thigh

And then the dragon turns his head
Mouth to mouth in living kiss.
Hearts they beat, with every second
Melting into gentle bliss.

Soon the moment slowly breaks
Moonlight cast through sheet of smog
Both anticipate the time
When they can start, again, to snog.

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[from Allison]

Rhysenn sits down, a story to write,
Of Draco and Harry alone late one night,
With a startling kiss the plot's set in motion,
With our fave bishonen and one blood red potion.

Rhysenn sits down, to write the next chapter,
Her thoughts interrupted by some happy laughter,
A couple of fangirls are outside her door,
Begging and pleading for there to be more.

Rhysenn starts plotting part number 3,
"Yo Rhysenn, hey Rhysenn! C'mon, more snogs please!"
Outside her window, quite a crowd's growing!
Waiting for signs of IP3's showing.

Rhysenn is writing some more for our boys,
But it's hard to think because of the noise.
Fangirls are drooling and begging for more,
Yelling, "Rhysenn, give us more snogs in 4!"

Rhysenn sits down, more tales to weave,
But the huge H/D crowd just refuses to leave!
"GIVE US MORE SNOGS NOW!" all of them shout,
They've blocked all the exits, now there's no way out!

Rhysenn keeps writing, but still there are more,
Throwing rocks at the windows and breaking down doors.
She throws them a cookie, hoping they'll go,
"Please go away!" They just yell, "NO!"

FF.net's gone, she hopes for reprieve,
And watches, so hopeful... as two of them leave.
The fangirls are screaming, Rhysenn's house is shaking,
And as she types Rhysenn's hands are quaking,

Hard hat on her head, combat boots on her feet,
A camoflauge suit and war paint on her cheeks,
She throws out a cookie to distract the masses,
As she tries to stop writing so she'll pass her classes!

Rhysenn's now frantic, 'most ready to cry,
NINE chapter's she's given, but it won't satisfy!
Now there's IP fics! And poems by fans...
And yet... as she reads one, she gets a plan.

The fans descend en masse on her latest post,
As they read their eyes widen, it's better than most!
With broadening grins they all leave in a flash...

They can't wait to use Rhysenn's "How to Write Slash."

~ ~ ~

Irresistible poison, the worst kind of death,
That wakens the heart 'stead of killing the breath.
In it, contradiction of heart and of will,
A potion of destiny that tasted like swill.

On one side, the victim of a fateful mistake,
The other, an innocent, accustomed to hate,
Between them the memory of years of scorn,
And bitter the rivalry over popcorn.

Real false emotion, ice in liquid form,
Only with him can the victim feel warm,
Because he's the greatest, everyone can see,
Now stop reading this and go reread IP!!!

(read the entire version from 'An Interrupted Attempt…')

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[from Caryl]

IP is the name of the story
It's a tale full of woe and glory.
Where everyone is confused
Except Hermione who's amused.

Poor Draco is lost in a world where his lust
is for none other than the object of his mistrust.
Our hero, Harry Potter, ever vigilant and brave
can't help but feel bad for poor Draco (though he thinks him a knave)

But unrequited love is sad
And Rhysenn's readers would be quite mad
If this state of affairs, in which we take such delight
ended with Draco and Harry in a fight
Just snog already is the motto
And boy do we think they oughta

But Rhysenn's drawing it out
and succeeding in making us pout
And it just isn't fair!
It's almost too much to bear.
For IP10 is quite late
and we're waiting with bated breath
to learn Harry and Draco's fate

But when it comes right down to the wire
there's only one thing that's dire
Which would be, as I've said already, our motto
Just snog him already! Potter you rotter!

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